God has revealed to me that I am a ravenous wolf and I need to repent. I feast on others as my prey and I love off of telling people what to do, how to do it, and speak about Jesus looking for glory. I am excessively covetous and grasping to make sure other people know I am good and not that God is. I am a false prophet and I am being told that to get rid of these wicked ways I have to pray and fast a lot. The ways that I'm ravenous is I beat others down either in my head or aloud for the sake of my arrogance, pride, selfishness, narcissism, ego, low self-esteem so that I can make myself feel better and boost my own self-esteem. I'm morally evil and need to seek God to change me. I bring shame to God when I feed off of others and beat others down. I shouldn't fight amongst my fellow Christians but lift up my family(fellow Christians and lost people). I'll gossip about someone and bad mouth them, but in their face only talk well with them and of them. Only and always speak well of others and don't make excuses or exceptions. When I do I justify my evil and God sees what I do. I build myself up at the expense of others and I need to STOP doing this and choose God's way of handling things with compassion, love, longsuffering, and patience.
This is something I wrote down in my notes after watching the rotten fruit video from warriors for Christ. I really need prayers to get through all of this because I am truly feeling my unworthiness and wickedness. I am struggling with calling myself Christian yet dealing with these issues. I am so selfish it's not even funny and I need help dying to myself and living for God. Please pray for my family as well(3 brothers, 1 sister, and parents) for they are also in many respects the same. Thanks to everyone who reads this and prays for me and my family. May God bless all who live their life for him.